just felt the urge to blog again for today. hmm....as i was watching tv, i kinda tink back of what i've been missing out in life. others may haf what they haf and maybe you urself want what they have but u feel that u've been shortchanged. sometimes these things can bring ur morale down and make u start thinking of what went wrong(maybe) and what is the traits u dun haf.

it is always disheartening when i start thinking about all these. y is it that at this point of time in my life as i move forward im facing this type of scenario? i used to haf what it takes last time to haf but now it seems taht i've lost most of it. well i dunno how long it will last and how much i can hold on till the very last stand. its always inbalanced towards with regards to the "thing" that im ranting about.

im not very sure about where i can find happiness and joy and im so very confused. u may see me smile smile smile but its all for the moment. as such, its irony that im serving the army. it kinda made me occupied and i dun haf to tink much of the scenario myself. but when there's nothing to do, the daunting task of repelling the reality is so so much obselete that its turning into a nightmare. someday in my life, i hope to think back again and be glad that i've past this stage. something to ponder about huh? its all inside me.

Protect ~ 8:32 pm