Didn’t have much to update guys. Sorry about that. Shall make it up for today then. Anyway im supposed to have my interim presentation at Ryder but Mr Ng pulled out at the 11th hour coz of the JAE thingy. I was so hyped up for today’s presentation as I was confident that I will do well…but things do happen sometimes…well I hope to see more of the bright side rather than the other.
Currently I am busy doing my project here in Ryder but I just gotta take some time off. Im feeling abit low morale. I have declared to my frendz that I wun be scolding anymore or at least try to cut down. Im changing this time for the better..hopefully so. Yea..still young but not getting any younger as I realized. So hence the cutting down of vulgarities and time to change the whole mindset…mayb less play and be serious when u need to be. This attachment has straighten out my thinking of what I wanna do in my later life if I still live, u noe accidents do happen, so we cant predict when we die or wat. Not being a pessimist here and the future’s a lil bit brighter if I go and study in Australia. I mean even with a diploma noe, it’s still not sufficient I guess to survive in Singapore. I hope our planning of the 3PL company will be a reality. Its going to eat a lot of time and money with unlimited commitments plus the ns as a liability. NS – 2yrs. Within that 2 years, a lot can be achieved or improved. And if we really gonna start up the 3PL company, someone’s gotta do the research, planning and decisions. But the big problem is….NS!! its really suckylah..
Anyway being a small 3PL in sg doesn’t haf much opportunities but we have to source out for new ideas and services. Wang has thought of many as usual, and if we really get the support from NP, then we will need some ppl to do research for us during the 2yrs.
Feeling abit down too..haiyah..sibei sianz man…its about her again. Saw something which puts me back at level 1. I tink someone’s really jioing her all the way. And that person is not me lah…dohz…Im interested but im not doing anything man…I tink im still not prepared to court a girl. Wang told me being single is gd. Can see he kinda sianz also of relationship. Yalah when u sianz, of coz u will say another thing.the same with me. When im sianz being single, of coz I want to court girls right?
And the thing that I want to bring up is that im single and sianz. Wanted to jio her but kept holding back. Used to have a lot of self confidence but I haf none now. I guess I will never noe whether I haf a chance or wat unless I tell it to her myself that I got feelings for her and want to know if it’s possible between us. Im constantly challenging myself. maybe its becoz of my star sign. I dunno…from young I got two different personality. Got a split personality as wat ppl says. Mayb that’s y im always contradicting myself..that’s a typical Gemini? Wanted to forget her but still liked her? Wanted to be with her but still want her to get attached to someone else so that I can forget her? I am indecisive too…bleah..that’s the worst thing man. Might be playing billiard with fellow pal weilong and shiming. But im still not sure…just need to go out tonite…really do…
This is the worse entry that I have ever written I tink. The uncertainties of life and friendship. A friendship that I want to bring to a next level but I just dun dare. I guess im such a coward?probably am…there’s endless thoughts about this issue and I still dun haf the courage to bare it to her. At least if I bare it to her, she will know how I feel and I can get the answer. That might put a stop of me liking her…but the truth is my feelings has deepened for her…its been a yr plus long liao…as time stretches, the feelings grew and grew…somehow somewhere someone’s gotta put a stop to this.
So what am I supposed to do now? The guy’s really jioing all the way man…probably waiting for her answer. Shud I sit here and do nothing but blog about my unhappiness day in day out? Haha…the biggest rubbish in my life I guess till now…the longest feelings developed for a gal…etc….and the ppl that I mix with, they told me I probably stand some chance…n I keep telling them that I haf none. I tink what I felt is really true lah…
